Think about the
equation A+B=C.
In this
equation, A cannot be C without B and B cannot be C without A. C itself is a
combination of both A and B. Now let’s say C is any situation in our daily life
like a friendly family game night for example. A will therefore be our surroundings
which in this case would be my living room where I would be sitting on my couch
facing my brother, mother and father. In the center would be a short wooden
table with the game set and ready to go. The variable B will then the most
important part of the equation: me.
Every moment of
our lives is governed by us and our interactions with our surroundings just as
C is a mixture of A and B. Therefore it is important to know ourselves so that we
can know what makes us happy, sad, and, on an extreme note, really angry.
It was the day
after Christmas for instance. We had just returned home from a family movie
night out. I was still giggling and chatting about the insane comedy in the
film we had watched. That was when my brother suggested a game night.
Now, I pride
myself in being very introspective, so I know much about what makes me
lose my temper. Ashamed as I am to admit
this, the truth is that although I can be very sweet tempered on the surface, I
have a short fuse and I can be very competitive. For that reason, I was very against
the idea of a game night.
However, my
other family members made the mistake of thinking it was a good idea.
Therefore, we
set up the game and sat down to play LUDO where each of us has four pieces that
we have to move across the board and try to get to “Home”. The one who gets all
pieces home first wins. Here’s the flip side, we are allowed to kill the pieces
of the other players. As you can probably tell, in this equation, A and B equal
a bad situation.
We all erupted
into a series of pointless arguments that ended with a broken laptop which was
sadly mine. As I have
already explained, I know myself very well since I live with myself 24/7. Such
self awareness is the key to minimizing behavior such as destructive anger and
violent behavior. I know I have
uncontrollable anger and my method is to avoid situations where I can lose my
temper (it has worked for the 17 years I lived on this earth) and if I don’t listen
to myself, I could potentially lose my brand new laptop.
It is my ability
to listen to myself that I really like about myself. I know my strengths and weaknesses,
and that ability allows me to settle down and get my priorities straight. In other words, if
I know it is impossible for me to do certain things, I don’t force myself because
everyone has things they can’t do (pushing myself to do my best is another
matter in itself). However, if I know I can do certain things and do it well, I
will do it no matter what and will put forth my best effort. This ability reduces the stress associated
with school and it is also the reason for my good humor and level-headed demeanor.
For most people,
it isn't as easy to talk about their qualities especially when the qualities are positive
and my theory is that it’s because it can be an embarrassing topic. For example, I don’t see myself the
same way others see me and sometimes I could call my humor one of my best
qualities when others don’t necessarily agree with it. In a way, it could be
degrading to place that label because it sets a cap on how high my qualities
could go.
Of course, not
everybody feels embarrassed about sharing their own qualities and usually the
ones who aren't are like me and can look within themselves. If I wasn't introspective,
I would have hated to share and set a label as well because then I wouldn't have
to face the disapproval of others and their view of who I am.
